What is IFS?
IFS stands for Internal Family Systems, an evidence-based and beautifully effective therapy approach begun by Dr. Richard (Dick) Schwartz, PhD. In my experience, it is highly effective because it does not label, stigmatize, shame, or push. It is very consent-based, allowing the client’s true Spirit-led self to take leadership over the many parts of themselves that are burdened and may be in conflict for control.
This clinical approach sees an individual as uniquely made up of many “parts” in their personhood— (similar to when we feel “a part of me wants to do this, but another part doesn’t”).
These “parts” of the person interact like members of a family —with all the personalities and roles often organized into protectors (firefighters and managers) and wounded exiles, stuck in extremes.
Like any family, misunderstandings, alliances, divisions, estrangement, traumas of these parts happen in the internal system—thus the term
Internal Family System. And like any family that has hope, reconciliation and healing can happen in the presence of compassionate leadership of the true self.
The Hope
The hope in this IFS model is that in the deepest and most centered part of the person is the true essence of who they are, their “Self”, or as some may refer to as their “Spirit-led Soul”. This “Self” has qualities that are healing: the 8 C’s (compassion, caring, curiosity, confidence, courage, connectedness, clarity, creativity) and 5 P’s (patience, playfulness, persistence, perseverence, perspective) which are among them. Some others (my colleagues and I have learned) may be humility, honesty, honor, and many more. And this is where the person can be unblended from their extreme parts and experience balance and freedom. This essence may be even described by those who are spiritual as where Divinity touches humanity bringing healing within and without. Thus, IFS is a model that is faith-friendly, and adaptable to the client’s own belief system in the concept of “Spirit-led” or wise Self. This allows the client to feel more empowered in the therapy space. In my practice, I have seen this approach help people heal within variety of contexts— a wide array of cultural, religious (and not) socioeconomic background and experiences. At the core, it is the hope of transforming leadership that restores harmony within. What does this have to do with the family system? (Read on by scrolling below or return to top of page)
When the Internal Family System is in a trusting relationship with and led by the Self (the essence of who you are inside), in all its Spirit-led love and wisdom, the parts that were in extreme roles become softened and more like a more balanced functional family system rather than extreme dysfunctional one.
And when we are in balance and harmony within, the same inevitably is projected and mirrored in our external relationships and our lives.